Working With Couples Considering Divorce Essay Example for Free

Working With Couples Considering Divorce EssayThe video documentary authorise Working with Couples Considering Divorce is an enlightening presentation slightly the rigors of dissever which individuals go through. Dr. William J. Doherty demonstrates the techniques he implored in dealing with people who are in a dilemma of resorting to divorce as a solution to conjugal union problems (Doherty, n. d. ). A twain visited Dr. Dohertys therapy clinic to designk for advice and therapy regarding their situation. They are thinking of dissolving their marriage which has run for twelve years, and which has given them two children. The husband has already moved out belatedly and is considering divorce with his wife, who considers it as well. By listening to each of them, Doherty is able to highlight a prognosis of their situation, see its overview and finally treat is as a unit. The fit is able to resolve their ambivalence in their commitment with Dr. Dohertys six-month therapy in whi ch both(prenominal)(prenominal) of them will try to work on their marriage for six months in advance making a decision regarding their marriage.The doctors stylus of dealing with the issue is talking to both of them as a couple, to each individually, taking turns, and thence back together. Dr. Doherty is able to demonstrate the importance of communication between couples in resolving the dilemmas they encountered about their marriage whether to keep the marriage or to discard it. some(prenominal) couples in the United States encounter the same ambivalence, which very much leads to deciding towards divorce since divorce is a common thing and is normally being resorted to most often as an immediate recourse.Couples wouldnt normally sit down and talk about their differences, and would give up after a few tries. Divorce is usually the easiest way out for several couples in the midst of an assailing matrimonial problem. This is the reason why only a few marriages in the United Sta tes survive, and couples are remaining with facing a impertinently life, a new perspective, and a new dimension as a divorcee, usually battling depression and emotional turmoil as an outcome.This is not to mention the financial losses that go with the divorce process, especially on the payment of alimony on the part of the ex-husband. The video documentary entitled Working with Couples Considering Divorce is able to demonstrate to us that there is a sure-fire way to get out of the divorce parameters, and that couples, given a prospect for a paradigm shift otherwise known as a change of view about their marriage structure, would not opt to look at this devastating occurrence.Oftentimes, as couples are carried away with the social bandwagon of divorce in which several married couples ride on so easily, they look at this counsellor to why not ride as well and view divorce as an immediate recourse for the ultimate solution to their problems. As American nightspot is highly oriented towards individualism, the surge towards divorce is a very likely and favorably convenient option especially if wiz sees his/her marriage as taxing or makes him carry several responsibilities.The easiest way is the way out, or so several couples thought. The strong attachment to commercialism is also unrivaled factor that may contribute to the rising statistics of divorce in the United States, apart from the strong stances towards individualism as the societys goal. This leads us into an inference that since couples are prepared towards material fulfillment, several marriages are assailed by this objective and are often lost in the enhancement of their jobs and career, with the marriage and the family left in the sidelines.The fast-paced life style of most American households also holds witness to its link with divorce occurrences, as people are used to resolving issues and problems in a speedy manner and divorce is one speedy remedy for a trembling and unstable marriage. How ever, the video documentary is able to put forward a conclusion that divorce is not always the way out, and that it is not easy at all. Hence, couples should not view it as the easiest remedy.There are emotional, psychological, and mental investments which couples have invested in their marriage, one of them are their children and the emotional attachment already established in years of being together. Thus, foregoing the marriage out of a more convenient brisk is not a likely solution for letting people who used to be part of ones life and are closed to ones heart slip away that easy. Dr. Doherty is aware of the potential rigors that each of the couple would go though had they considered divorce.It is clear that in the video review, the couples problems are not that unbridled or epidemic, nor was there any element of domestic violence for example, which is a very likely rational reason to set aside the marriage, for both the wifes sake and that of the childrens. Rather, the issue s involved in the couple who visited Dr. Doherty for marriage counseling and therapy only include drifting away of the husband and the wife, making them feel as if they were not couples anymore or were not functioning as such. Hence, ending the marriage through divorce is one solution they both consider.As communication is important in couples in order to find the right solution to their problems, it is evident that the couples had lack of it or seemed to have gone inutile in properly dealing with it regarding their differences. As such, their visit to Dr. Doherty is both a timely and advisable one, since they are able to redirect themselves towards it again. It takes a marriage therapy for both of them to be enlightened about their marriage situation, see it as a whole unit in a constructive perspective, and seek only positive remedies that are both beneficial and appropriate for it.The couples are able to undertake this successfully in their consultation therapy with Dr. Doherty. With the therapy, they are able to view the internal causes of their marriage, which late but surely drifts apart, see it as a personal obligation and commitment to repair, undertake a fresh way to deal with the dilemma, and finally conclude to start anew, not by opting for divorce but through renewing each others commitment in the marriage.It is necessary that the couples be point accordingly on viewing their situation, not merely offering them a concrete solution, but leading them towards seeing their problems individually and as a couple, creating and re-creating a solution for these problems, considering the entire scenario in the decision making, and renewing and redirecting earlier stances into more stable and ground-founded ones. This is how Dr. Doherty is able to lead the couple in dealing with their ambivalence about divorce.Certainly, a marriage therapist like Dr. Doherty always aims for the preservation of marriage, and he is able to do this successfully in the couple through their own epitome of their situation and by being redirected into a different perspective on their marriage. It is clear that Dr. Doherty used Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in his dealing with the couples problems, which is geared towards modifying cognitions, assumptions, beliefs, and behaviors (Stuart, et al. , 2004). Dr.Doherty is able to outline potential unrealistic and unhelpful beliefs and assumptions which the couple considers, along with trying out new ways of behaving and reacting. This is illustrated in the view that the marriage is doomed, that it wont work out no matter how much we try, that we cannot settle our differences and we have to file a divorce and move on with our new lives. These perspectives are the perspectives that the couple in the video documentary had upon visiting Dr. Dohertys clinic, which was then refocused after a thorough therapy of six months.With the six-month therapy, the couple is able to see the importance of their marriage and the s ignificance of nourishing the time of being together through a renewed perspective. Through this, the manner of behaving and reacting on their marriage is changed into a more favorable and beneficial one. The ambivalence for divorce is solved this way though Dr. Dohertys help.ReferencesDoherty, W. (n. d. ) Working with couples considering divorce. DVD. ISBN 1-59147-440-X Stuart, R. B. , Broderick, C. , and Gurman, A. S. (2004) Helping couples change A social attainment approach to marital therapy. The Guilford Press.